Horatio, otherwise known as Bob

I had a real Horatio moment earlier today.

‘Horatio moment?’ you ask yourself.  ‘What on earth could that be, and who made up such a silly name for whatever it is?’  Yes, I know you’re thinking it.

You remember Horatio, the trusty (if ultimately unfortunate) sidekick from Hamlet.  I’ve always loved that line from early in the play that always ends up on high school Hamlet quizzes: 

There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, than are dreamt of in your philosophy.

Therefore, I have decided that a Horatio moment is when you realize that you don’t know everything that’s out there.  Like little green men, or census workers.  Now, I’ve had many of those throughout my life (my family calls them epiphanies), when I realized that the post office keeps all their vehicles behind the post office, or finally connected the dots on why it’s called corn starch.  Yah.  I know.  Please don’t judge.  But this Horatio moment was a doozy, and showed me a new level of geekness that I had somehow failed to notice even existed.

I don’t know if you’ve ever heard of RPGs.  Role playing games.  The term usually refers to D&D, although I have seen a number of online communities dedicated to writing a storyline as specific characters (either currently existing or self-made).  Up until now I had never taken the term LARP seriously.  I always thought it applied to medieval reenactment (which is a fun activity that I wish I had the money and time to engage in, but that’s a discussion for another time).

I was wrong.  So wrong.  My brain and eyeballs feel like they’ve been dumped in white-hot coals and let to sit awhile.  It’s bad.

I have discovered there is a Space Center in Pleasant Grove, Utah that has space ship simulators.  Now, that sounds fairly innocuous, right?  What if I told you they were Star Trek simulators?  It’s true!  You dress in bad uniforms (they really need to up their quality; they don’t even try to recreate the uniform or address the intricacies of cross-cultural uniforms), climb aboard a pretend space ship which will rock and shift and take you through spacial anomalies to neutral zones turned battlefields.

Now as a late convert to Equality for Star Trek & Star Wars, I like Star Trek just fine.  Although The Next Generation is largely acknowledged as the best series, the others can be enjoyable as well.  But, roleplaying in real life?  Dressing up as a Scotsman and recreating your grandfather’s favorite haggis recipe is one thing.  But Star Trek in real life?  With cheap uniforms and bad accents?  I think that’s where I draw the line.

Or I could be a little jealous and not have the money to do it myself.

However, they do run simulator camps for kids….

By the way, you can blame Shakespeare for the name Horatio.

I would have gone with Bob.

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